23 Comments

Christine, this was so wonderful and a much needed reminder. I love the taxi metaphor and also remembering the context in which I am showing up. I bet it would help to remember that if I am not in my office then I am not in my therapy role 🤣 love the suggestion for turning off, particularly the ritual suggestion. Thank you for this wonderful post! 😍

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Yes, you would need such strong boundaries in your role! I can only imagine what people say to you on a plane or at a party! The leaving one's office is a good separation! (It also reminds me how much harder it would be when people are working from home!)

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I listened to your post and allowed my light to be switched "off" for a moment. Thank you for this inhale, and for the beautiful Brene quote.

I love the spoons concept- I will hold onto this for when I need to learn on it!

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Thanks! I was thinking of you in writing this piece, especially as I know many of my tendencies to not "switch off" are due to people pleasing tendencies!

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I have a day booked this week for time at a Poustinia. This newsletter was a reminder that I do need that time to rest, to plan, to be ready to enter a new season of spiritual direction. Thank you for the reminder that it’s ok to be off duty.

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I hope your day of rest and contemplation was exactly what you needed! I have future plans to do a post on retreat that you may be interested in!

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Ohhhhhh, thank you, Christine. This hits home so powerfully for both me and my husband, who is also a pastor. Your words reminded me of how many “emotionally expensive professions” you have (to use Kate Bowler’s term). I love your ritual idea (among the many pieces of practical wisdom you offer). Thank you!

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Oh goodness, as a clergy couple, you could write a whole treatise on this! How hard that must be to "turn off"! And what a great term from the amazing Kate Bowler, thanks for introducing it to me!

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Thank you Christine for your goodness and your wisdom. May we all end each day knowing that “ I have given my best today, and it is enough." And now I get to curl up and read Christine’s post!

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Thanks Karla! And I think your end of day ritual should also feature a croissant! (although maybe that's more of a morning thing 😂)

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Abundant wisdom & resources- thanks, Christine!

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Thanks Mary Beth - as I said, it's been hard-won knowledge for me!

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This is excellent and very timely! I have problems with limits and going "off duty". A good reminder for myself and others, that we don't always have to be "on duty".

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Glad it was helpful! Hopefully your boss isn't working you too hard when you should be "off duty"! 😉

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It's not in the office at all. It's when I'm walking the hallways that I'm always on duty.

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Setting boundaries and particularly the ritual to go “off-duty” can be helpful even for those of us who aren’t in the caregiving profession. Thanks!

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Yes, great point, it's really essential for everyone, regardless of vocation!

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Lovely wisdom here. Thank you!

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Thanks for reading Mary!

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This is really really helpful - thank you. Giving ourselves permission not to be on duty 24/7 is very important but so hard to do!

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So very hard to do! Especially when we love what we do so much!

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Oh don't get me started on dinner parties! It does help me to know that it seems like regardless of the profession, people still get asked work-related questions that prevent them from being "off duty" (My husband who's in tech gets computer support questions, but I think the body and soul inquires are much harder to avoid!)

And that is a great point on the divine timing piece. I have heard and said some of those sentiments myself, which I still think can be true, but makes it even harder to turn off. Although if God is sending me to a certain situation and I don't act - then I can rest assured that God is sending a back up too and it's not all on me!

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I love this post, Christine! This topic has absolutely been a part of the professional struggle and past burnout for me. And it's funny as a physical therapist throughout my career at dinner parties and such people always want to ask questions about their body off the cuff. It seems so innocent and yet it's not the mindset that I want to be in when I'm not there. And it feels mean to not answer and yet that's only my perception. It's not mean. It's being off the clock.

The other piece this brought up for me was the sort of Christian service and divine timing faulty theology. I was put here in this moment to help this person and an intense emotional situation. It's my duty because it's a divinely appointed interaction. It doesn't mean I have to ignore everyone in need but I really appreciate understanding as you put it that the sustainability factor for living my own life with intention is at stake here. It definitely calls that belief into question and I think for good reason. Thank you again! 💜

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